Equipped with Love

How to save the flame
from the fire,
when the flame is at the heart
and the heart is the fire.
What does one desire,
but to be humbled
in the grace of love?
In the form of a dove
You came to me
Encountered in many ways
and even in ways not yet known.

The thorns
are experienced daily
through the witness
of the experience.
Hourly we are called.
By minute we have thought
and in the seconds,
we sometimes forget
to remember
that which is most important.

The sword of truth
is sworn to secrecy
and if revealed all will be well,
If only the peace of surrender
Will follow.
To follow otherwise would
only be in the eyes of the follower
And in so doing would no longer
Be following, but leading
Which could be tragic,
if not in the right spirit.

For the mind
does not always align
with the heart,
so we need to listen
to a different rule
not the lies that our thoughts
sometimes provoke.
For when we listen to these lies
we are blinded by the stillness,
when in reality there is so much more
for us to experience.
In the dance of motion
In the dance of life.


It is there that we seek solace,
It is there that we seek peace.
When all else is chaos
There is a place to call home,
Even when it seems to be far
From us
It requires only that knock
Only that seeking
And you will find
That simply behind the door
Is the place of rest
Peace on earth
And mercy mild
Are we reconciled?

Look inside and all will be revealed
What picture do you see?
Puffed up and fearful
Or meek, mild and fearless,
In a tiny manger
Equipped with Love for the
Whole world.

For Shore

Look in, look out
Breathe up, breathe down
Hard to return to the ground
And plant your feet soundly
Once you’ve been flying
And sailing the seven seas
Miles of time have held that place
In the arms of time
Remind the sailor where he has been
Because he has seen so much
That it now blends together
In the mosaic of memory
In the place where the boom of the sail
Is louder than the pounding of the railway
Look in, look out
Farther inward than out and you will be okay
Breathe up and breathe down
So there is room to grow in the lungs of time
That inhale and exhale every present moment
Sometimes we have the luxury to enjoy every moment
And other times it feels a chore
But one thing is for shore
The sea breathes in every memory
It breathes in and out with the tide
And we look in, look out on the horizon
Where the sun both rises and sets,
Depending on which direction you look
And at what time
Blinded by the sun and enlightened at the same time
Yet not fully ignited because the flames are only lit
In our hearts
Each flame burns differently
And although we do not see
We know there is a flame in all people that we meet
Each person we know and people we pass by
This flame unites us, though we know not why
We do not always need the answer, nor the alibi
But to weep with those who cry
To give thanks with those who rejoice
To mourn with those who are saying goodbye
We have this gift to live alongside one another
To love and to be loved
What a gift.

Letters of Lace

Lovely letters of lace
That keep my mind
On the time that I knew you all too well
The dance and the music
Were not synchronized
Yet I was hypnotized by your glare
As you cared your way
Into the moonlit sky
I knew by the sound of the lullaby
That each and every lovely letter of lace
That has kept my mind
On the time that I knew you all too well
The dance and the music
Were not synchronized
Yet I was hypnotized by your glare
As you cared your way
Into the moonlit sky
The sound of the lullaby
Sent to us by the mountain tops
Allowed not only the ocean’s wave
To cease, but to begin yet again
That is where the heart lies
In the beginning’s end
That is where we take our first breath
And also take our last
Would we like to outlast
The leaves as they fall
The tulips as they bloom
The snow as it glistens
And the sun as it burns through the skin
And there lies the new skin
Underneath the beauty of it all
So that we know it’s all going to be okay
The day will come
Where we will all come face to face
With what we’ve been running from
And dancing towards
That still hand
That peaceful voice
That quiet soul
That we know to be true
That I have no doubt is you
Thank you
To you

Hole Sole

Lovely letter of beauty
In the twilight of my mind

Eyes that sparkle intertwine
With minds that soar
Up to the space
When the moon meets the stars
I’ll know that Mars
Is still there

Until then I’ll wonder
If stars ever really do meet, or do they just collide
With one another
In the shadow of my mind

Hopes, fears & joy!
Surround in sound
With speakers full of ice
That melt my heart
Into the valley of my Love for you

It’s strangely wonderful
And wholly true
Even the colours tell a story
About you
About the earth
About Life

The most wonderful place to be
Is to BE

To not hesitate in the beauty
Of the day, even the most dreadful day
Strangeness abounds
In the theories of my mind

For who can really understand
All that exists?
And to even try
Is to deny
The existence of the fullness
Of what life has to offer

Others experience what I have not
And vise versa
We do not know the size of the shoes
And especially the bare blistered souls of others
So I will not attempt to walk in them

We'll be right on time

Is it our gifts
that define us?
Or what we give
that intertwines
the circumstance
of our lives?

In making sense
of it all
I climbed a ladder
so tall
it almost took me
to heaven and back,
but not quite.

With all my might
I lifted
the weight
right off your shoulders
and you felt alright
Once again
at least for now

You're my today
I'm your tomorrow
and that's the way
it's always been

You live and act
in the present
and I'm procrastinating
into the future
where
Somewhere
our worlds collide
to become the fullness
of time

Spare me a moment
of yours
and I'll tell you
the secret of time
has no rhyme or reason
that we can see
at least in this season
of our lives

Somehow at the meeting place
when the clock
strikes with precision
we will know
that the time is now
and act in unison
unaware
that we even share
a moment
in time
until it's almost gone

Realize
that time is on our side
and don't work against it
Keep climbing that ladder
I'll take the stairs
and meet you there.

Don't worry,
We'll be right on time...

Written on June 18, 2012

Synaxis of Remembrance

Lost what I thought I had
gained what I had not.
In the process
lost myself,
but not all that I knew.

When this took place
did time stand still
and take pity on my circumstance?

No! Time went on
and life around me
surrounded me,
even though a life
I had lost.

All has not been forgot
and never will completely,
for that soul
has played an important role
and it’s a part of what completes me.

The seed
planted within
grew up precious from the start.

I grieve
that not everyone
got to participate
in this precious life,
but now he gets
to participate
with the angels.
In worship.

He got a one way ticket
just a few months in,
but his passport
is still.
Stamped with Love.

Love so intense
if another could sense it,
they would likely cry a river
along with me in my sea.

I ask why sometimes
and know I’ll get no answer.
Even when there may be one
or two or three or four,
there is no verbal word
of consolation
from my expectations.
Deep within and far without.

How do people go on
when they lose a loved one?
Life goes on around us,
but life within our hearts
does not.

Perhaps there is always
a part of our heart
that will never move again,
but rather stands still
in the synaxis of remembrance
and love
sent from above
not as an answer
but as a comforter.

Nurture the part of the heart
that moves on
with the outer life that does too,
so that participation in life is your gift
to the life lost.

Nurture also the part of the heart
that stands still
and ceases to move,
there you’ll find
that love is growing
as you continue to love.

So I will not delay.
I remain hopeful
that day of meeting
is around the mountain,
that with faith, takes
only a mustard seed to move.

Written Saturday, June 16^th 2012

Anastasis

On Monday May 21^st, 2012 we had a miscarriage in the evening. I was in my second trimester. We were looking forward to announcing our exciting news and we were slowly doing so, but with our last miscarriage, in 2009, at 15 weeks, we were announcing it even slower than perhaps we might have otherwise. So now it is with sadness that I tell briefly to our family and friends, that yes we were expecting and yes the baby is now with our Lord. I lost a lot of blood and even had a blood transfusion. We named the baby Anastasis, which is Greek for“Resurrection”. Our child was a little boy and we had the burial on Saturday, May 26^th, 2012 in a small country church cemetery. We are thankful he has laid to rest peacefully. I’ve missed more church the last while than I have in my whole life, due to Basil being sick a while ago and then myself being sick and then losing this baby. I feel it is good for people to know what we have gone through, because it's been such a huge part of our life.

Basil was really excited to be a big brother and he still is a big brother, just not the way he was looking forward to. We now have 3 children: 1 on earth and 2 in heaven. I guess Seraphim, our other son who was already up in Heaven, now has a sibling there with him and I find comfort in that. Please pray that our Anastasis’ Memory will be Eternal! We will never forget him. We loved him dearly, still do and always will. His life was such a joy and blessing to us. We are sad, but thankful for how precious life is.

An icon by Fr. Vladimir Lysak that we had made after the passing of our son Seraphim.

Strange how every experience is so different. After losing Seraphim, I felt more despair than this time around. Although I have great sadness, I also feel a renewed thankfulness for life and feel blessed to live. Please don't feel too sad for us, but rather remain hopeful with us in the Resurrection. Memory Eternal little Anastasis!